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Vatican II: The Wrath of John

March 12, 2013

I thought I would use the current conclave as an occasion to bring out this title, which has been loitering in my mind with more persistence than it deserves. I am neither a Trekkie nor a Catholic. Both ways of life involve preoccupations that are alien to my nature. Both tend to veer more toward the kitschy, campy,  and paraphilic than I am comfortable with. Still, I draw a firm line against bigotry in either case, and am willing to extend some admiration to the devotion and unselfconscious enthusiasm that can be found among these tribes.  And although I cannot say that I have ever given much thought to either Gene Roddenberry or Pope John XXIII, all respect to them as icons of post-war liberal progress and hope.

Pope Prediction: I am liking Ouellet, the Canadian. The Cardinals are thinking, “We need someone who will be a breath of fresh air, but who will not rock the boat. Where can we find such a man?” The answer, of course, is Canada. If some Cardinals are leaning toward Scola and some toward Turkson, with a feisty Latin section favoring Scherer, then they will need a compromise candidate. Where do you find compromise? Canada! I know he has fallen out of favor with the oddsmakers, but that is all the more reason to bet on the Canadian. At 10-1, you could make a killing.

Update: In a shocking upset (33-1 odds offered by one bookie), Argentina’s Jorge Bergoglio comes out of nowhere to take the crown and become Francis I.  Like the great Link Wray, he has lived his life with just one lung.

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